Safe!

One afternoon last April, I pulled into the parking lot of a convenience store and began to get out of the car when a man approached me. He had a knife and forced himself into my car, making me switch to the passenger’s seat. He wanted money, but I quietly told him I had none, and he became quite angry. He grabbed my shirt and pushed the knife into my side several times, but the knife seemed dull to me and didn’t inflict any pain.

All my life, I’ve read Bible stories of God’s unrivaled authority—of Him closing the mouths of lions and rescuing the young Hebrew men from the fiery furnace—but never before had I felt so awesomely God’s protective care. While I was in the car with this man, I recognized the severity of the situation, but I can honestly say that I was not afraid. I somehow knew the redeeming power of divine Love would keep me safe, and I wanted him to feel that Love, as well.

As I think back on this experience, it reminds me of Mary Baker Eddy’s reference in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures to the Revelator’s vision of “a new heaven and a new earth.” She asked: “Have you ever pictured this heaven and earth, inhabited by beings under the control of supreme wisdom?” I like to think I got a glimpse of that new heaven and earth in the car, because I had this peaceful sense that both the man and I were governed by divine Love, rather than by fear or some evil motive. The man demanded the keys to my car and put them in the ignition as if to leave the convenience store. Right then, I tried unsuccessfully to escape from the passenger’s side door and cried for help. In retaliation, he threatened my life and forcefully pushed the knife toward my chest, but again he didn’t inflict any pain.

Before long, a passerby approached the car and shouted out asking if I needed help, prompting my attacker to run away from the scene. The passerby and several other men in the parking lot pursued the man, caught him and were able to detain him until the police arrived. Once the man was arrested, my rescuers continued to show great concern for me. One man even gave me a big hug. The genuine kindness of these men and of the police strengthened my trust in good. In situations like these, we often think that violence has the upper hand and that our innocence makes us vulnerable or helpless. But I began to see innocence as powerful, and as having the capability of overcoming evil of every sort.

I was profoundly grateful for God’s care when later I saw an up-close view of the knife, which the police retrieved and logged into evidence. The knife was much larger than I recalled and was anything but dull. I could hardly believe that the knife they had in their possession was the same weapon that earlier seemed so ineffective, but the police assured me this was the case. Similarly, the paramedics, who insisted on examining me after the attack, found that the knife had barely pierced my skin. As I drove home that day, I rejoiced in the recollection of how the young Hebrew men escaped without even their hair singed or their clothes smelling like smoke.

Following this experience, my prayers concentrated on mentally rewriting the history of events so that in my mind neither this man nor I assumed the roles of victim and villain. In a Journal article I came across on this subject, I was struck by a statement that showed how my salvation was linked to this man’s: “No one can find heaven for himself without finding his brother there too” (“Neither Villains Nor Victims,” February 1943, p. 106). I grasped that the spiritual demand was not merely to forgive the man who had assaulted me, but to have the spiritual discernment to see that he was in “heaven” with me—in God’s divine state of harmony right here on earth.

As I thought further about this incident, I looked into the meaning of the word crime. One source described the word as stemming from a root meaning “to separate” or “to judge.” To me, this meaning hints at the underlying error behind instances of violence and criminal acts—the notion that the brotherhood of humanity can be torn apart. More than once in her writings, Mrs. Eddy mentioned the role Christian Scientists have in stopping crime. For example, she wrote in Science and Health that “those who discern Christian Science will hold crime in check.” In the past, I had often wondered how I could fulfill this duty, and here I had a clear opportunity to do so. And while I was grateful that I had escaped injury during the assault, I clearly didn’t want anything like this to happen again to me, or to anyone else. So I prayed to see more clearly that mine or anyone’s relationship with our fellow brothers and sisters cannot be severed—by greed or hatred or any other animal instinct. Why? Because we are all eternally at one with God, with good, and our unity with the Divine forms the basis of our interconnection with each other. By understanding that we are inseparable from God, that we have everything we need because He is our supplier, our loving Mother and Father, we can help put a stop to criminal thinking and behavior.

Several months after this experience, I accepted the prosecutor’s offer to issue a statement at the man’s sentencing hearing. I thought deeply about this decision, desirous of communicating my forgiveness to the man and to the court, but also not wanting to seem naive. In the end, I was moved by Mrs. Eddy’s counsel not to let the Golden Rule “rust for lack of use” (The First Church of Christ, Scientist, and Miscellany, p. 213), as I realized I would want the man to speak at my trial if I were in his situation. I delivered a short statement conveying my hope that he would be able to move beyond this experience, just as I had. The man spoke, too, and expressed his remorse, explaining that his behavior had been an aberration from the person he had hoped to be. When the judge handed down what was regarded by all parties as a very fair sentence, he remarked, “Mercy constitutes the heart of true justice.”

Since this time, I have continued to feel at ease and unafraid when traveling in the city by myself. Just as shadows can leave no permanent mark, and dreams have no bearing on reality, I remain mentally (and physically) untouched by this incident. I can recall previous circumstances when I’ve been tempted to rehearse the trauma I experienced, recycling troubling thoughts or images over and over. Yet, in reality, as God’s beloved image and likeness, I experienced no such human history. Because of my commitment to holding to this truth, I didn’t suffer from any lingering fears or aftereffects.

Moving forward, I am grateful not only for this illustration of God’s care, but also for what it has shown me of the potency of prayer in bringing healing to our larger community.

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